November 18, 2012

How Not To Find Sanity in a Insane World.

I am losing it or I have already lost it, or maybe somewhere in between... I'll go with in between, that will at least give me hope, and hope is good... at least I hope so. Oh good god of all, I need ether to cry, to scream or to dig a whole and bury myself in it.

 My house is chaos, it is in disarray... I am in a roundabout...and I don't know how to get out of it. I need order; I cannot take any more of this... I clean, kids mess, I give up kids still mess, I yell kids mess, I bribe… still a mess... I pull my hair out... house is still a mess...with my hair all over. Oh and little shit head puppy makes sure she gets her shear of the mess in to.

To make matters worse kids have a three day week at school, I am beginning to loathe holidays, weekends snow days and summer. Now I understand my mom, as I never have before...and am getting why she does not see her grandkids much. We burnt the poor women out, and my girls are working me the same way. My oldest had the audacity to ask me to home-school her "HOME-SCHOOL!!" is she kidding me... I would rather go to the dentist and have him/her pull my teeth out with no Novocain then homeschooling...Homeschooling would be pure torture.

So I am thinking I may be losing my mind, or already have... not sure, still debating it. But I need to try to make it another 11 years sane... or not..... I could always get a cardboard box in a dark ally, Wow!! that is sounding kind of peaceful about now. But knowing my luck they will

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