I realize I have been a whiny baby with my post as of late, and do need to get back to the true reason why I have stuck with this blog. Learning about submission, working through the questions and worries I have with being submissive, figuring out what submission means to me and how to accept it for what it is. With in time I will.
Lately I have not been able to put much thought or effort in my submission, or even question my submission and lack there of.
The internal war that was going on between accepting being submissive and accepting that I have masochistic tendency have fallen silent. It is a blank spot in my mind, nothing seems to be there,
no matter how many times I try to think about it , I go blank... there is nothing.
I have come to the conclusion that my mind is too cluttered with other pressing thoughts that do need attention. I have bottled up deep, dark issues that as of recent have come bubbling to the surface and in need to be addressed.
I will use this blog as a medium to get a lot of stuff out of my head to allow the bubbles to overflow and to finally allow myself to let go.
I will be utterly boring, whiny and just have a big-ole pity party. But at the same time it will allow me to show my weaknesses, my vulnerability in a safe setting.
You have been warned, there will be nothing kinky going on here, at least for now.