Self-discovery has been a bit overwhelming, but Pandora’s Box is open... and you all know once Pandora is released she will wreak havoc as she seeks. I know there is no going back, and with that I have regrets though I try not to live my life with regrets, yet they still are there.
I wish I didn't answer his e-mail, I wish I did not wake him up before I left the morning after our first meeting. I wish I did not push for it. I wish for more but wishes are fairy tales and what is done, is done and Pandora has spoken so now I lie broken, hands to the air...cursing asking what have I done, what have I done to me.
There is no quick fix to this...I have been vulnerable before... though at that time I was able to withdraw into my own private world. This time is different, different than before. This time I have the knowledge to allow it to be more.
I cannot run, I cannot hide, I cannot disappear back into my inside. I am vulnerable and with that knowledge I shall cry....and hopefully with the tears I can release my fears.