June 8, 2013

The Here and Now

So I have a little free time to put thoughts into words. Though not uninterrupted free time...free time nonetheless.

I am trying to process what is going on with my new fling, he is a wonderful man, sweet, kind, giving, funny, a wonderful communicator, open, and willing to be vulnerable with me. I find that
I am not questioning his intent, it is clearly written in his eyes, and what his eyes do not tell his actions portray. There is no uncertainty to his willingness to be true, I do believe what he says, I do not feel he is trying to fool me, pull the wool over my eyes, be a wolf in sheep's clothing. He is real, and I am not frightened by him. I am not intimidated by his openness, his willingness...his vulnerability.  

So what is a girl to do? I could pick him to pieces, try to dig for something gruesome. Make up, make believe stories in my head to make me think he is not who he says. But I don't feel like doing that, I don't feel like running, I don't feel like closing off, or regressing. I don't feel like chasing him away by all means necessary. I really would like him to stay.... I like him, I truly do.

I would like to write down my fears, but my fears are premature they hold no logic or reason, and I am ok with that. I don't feel I need to, I don't feel the need to make something out of nothing, or nothing out of something. I think I will just enjoy this one, I think I will savor the refreshing taste of something real, and easy...something true, not perfect, just right at the right time.

I know without any doubt that no matter what will become of him and I, that it is going to be good. I don't know why, I just know. He is unlike any other man I have met,(my closest  comparison is to my children's father, but not as dramatic) there is just a natural comfort, nothing needing to be forced. Not even needing to get ahead of myself, just easy, breezy...comfortable.

So that is where I am at, not closing the door to other possibilities, just enjoying the here and now.

Kinda how I feel when the wee ones are out of school.



  1. One day at a time. Sounds like you're in a good place. :)

    1. I think I am Sarah, about time lol

  2. As Sarah said, enjoy the moments, let them see where they take you and trust your instinct!


  3. Anna May: Good! Yes, enjoy these moments. Enjoy the experiences of having someone who feels comfortable and who makes you feel good ;o)